Heir To The Balcony: A Talking Stuff Bear Or McConaughey Stripping?


In a nutshell this is just going to be live action Family Guy type full length movie just with a raunchy stuffed talking bear. Can we at least get a fight between Ted and the Snuggles bear a la Peter and the Chicken? I’m talking 6 straight minutes of a stuffed bear fight hopefully over either prostitutes or blow. If they’re doing they better not hold anything back because they have a stuffed bear on the screen. You planned on a R rating so freaking use the hell out of it. I want Bad Santa meets Superbad. Make it happen MacFarlane! Initial reviews are giving a lot of credit to Wahlberg for his comedic presence in this flick. Going to be hard to beat his comedy roles in The Happening or The Planet Of The Apes remake though. Watch those again and tell me they aren’t comedies. That’s why Mila Kunis, the angel of our time, agreed to be in this movie anyways.


Magic Mike

We called a guy Magic Mike in high school. He had no stripping skills nor did he play hoops like Jordan. His moments were just ‘special’. Just like his moments were special I’m beginning to think Channing Tatum should be counting his special moments left too.

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At least Matthew McConaughey may save this story a bit, lord knows the BDNS didn’t fight his casting for a male stripper part. Pretty sure half of us would turn gay for him, mostly Jeff. Girls, just a reminder, but you can’t pleasure yourself in a movie theater. I mean you can, but you may find yourself next to a girl version of Chris Farley behind bars later that night.


Stay tuned early next week for a special Heir To The Balcony for The Amazing Spiderman!